It’s pretty easy to get swept away in the current that is Valentine's Day whether it be a day of romantic love with your partner or a lot of scream-singing “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together” by Taylor Swift, but like the moon that controls the tides, what is not as easy but even more ever-present, is showing your skin (and self) what true love really means.
As boundless as self-love and loving the skin you’re in really are, I’ve come to realize that 2023 is the year of managing expectations. With that being said, this realization has already played a key role in not only how I showcase my love to others, but (full circle moment) how I showcase love to myself. So in the spirit of doing everyone (ourselves included) a favor, I have condensed the top 3 and most effective tips I have experienced, received, researched, and presently practice for your perusing pleasure.
Create accessible & positive rituals
This first tip is brought to you by the many individuals (shoutout to my roomie) who have recommended the best seller “Atomic Habits” by James Clear. If I am being totally transparent, I did a little more of a light skim but what did stick out to me and has proven extremely effective has been the creation of simple habits. I feel like this is a time-old concept, however, the essential word of this suggestion is simple. And by simple I mean so shockingly plain and easy that the action is as available as charging your phone by your bed at night. So now you may be saying to yourself, “well charging my phone next to my bed just makes sense” and you’re right, it does. That is the entire point, you have created the path of least resistance to the goal, which in this case is keeping your lifeline juiced up and ready for the next full day of activities and doom scrolling.
Now that we have the main idea on lock, we take it all the way to the bank and cash out on what wealth really looks like these days, mental wellness and hydrated skin. For a notorious dry-skin fiend like myself, the cocktail of simple habit meets the promise of glowing skin is one drink that goes down easy every time. This particular recipe starts with your favorite body lotion, in my case the Flower Wrap Body Moisturizer, and the most accessible/visible place possible. I think you can figure out what happens next, at least physically (glowing skin wrapped in a hydrated hug of moisture and floral bliss). However, what is actually taking place is a chain reaction that may start with maintaining the health of your skin, but ends with a little tick off the mental accomplishments box. Build those mental ticks up over time and before you know it those same goals of loving the skin you’re in and accepting yourself is your current reality.
Leave comparison at the door
This particular tip is brought to you by the constant stream of media and propaganda that are filtered through your screen daily amidst the hours of doom-scrolling as previously mentioned earlier. This is also one of those tips that run the risk of coming across as hypocritical. I say this with the utmost transparency and intention to normalize typical human emotions while also bringing us back to managing expectations. It is absolutely okay to take a step over to the dark side of comparison, so when diving into what comparison has to do with loving the skin you’re in, take a breath, cut yourself some slack, and realize that we are all out here just trying to make it through the day. So now that we’ve established that living in a constant state of doing you is a lovely sentiment, but not a realistic expectation, we can move on to what leaving comparison behind really looks like these days.
I’ll begin with one of my all-time favorite sayings that never fails to check me when I start to step toward that dark place and that happens to be, the world needs all kinds of people. This personal quote is my anchor in the treacherous waves that are tossing my lifeboat. To break it down, if everyone was a doctor, lawyer, or influencer, the world would be a pretty bland place. Accepting yourself is at times an uphill battle but if you take anything away from this article, it's that you have a very relevant and unique role to play in this world. So take a breath, maybe spritz a little Universal Woods Toner to calm the senses, and say it one more time for the people in the back, the world needs all kinds of people, and I’m one of them.
Drink up
Yup. You read it right. Drink. It. Up. But to be fair we haven’t discussed what exactly we will be throwing back at this point. So, I’d like to open up the floor to a couple of options and invite you, dear peruser, to choose your journey.
I’ll bring to the stage the most fitting, and possibly obvious option at this time, and that’s water baby. I know, I know, you probably saw this from a mile away, however, that's just how important getting your 13 cups a day really is. In terms of your skin’s relationship with staying physically hydrated, you’re looking at some choice benefits such as improving skin’s elasticity, smoothing soft lines/wrinkles, balancing pH, flushing toxins, and preventing acne. Now that you know what is waiting for you on the other side of hydration, the term drink up becomes, if possible, even more enticing.
Next in line, is drink up in reference to everything about yourself from your defining features to how you think, walk, and even breathe. It’s easy to be your own biggest critic, but to be your biggest fan is a whole new ballgame. This is yet another tip I have picked up from the people around me, and it’s a lot more fun than chipping away at yourself. Whether it is from the comfort of your own home or out with friends, acting and speaking like you are the absolute most important person in the room will truly open the floodgates. And what comes pouring in, is nothing short of increased appreciation and love for who you are and what you have to give (a lot).
Final thoughts
It goes without saying that these tips are not the end all be all and I will always be a supporter of therapy in tandem with daily acts of self-compassion. Loving the skin you are in and accepting yourself is absolutely a journey and never a destination. And from the perspective of a typical everyday human (aka myself), it is always much easier said than done. This is where the practice of managing expectations will truly make a difference. So take a breath, a nice drink of water, put the blinders on, and focus on the star of the room (you).
- Katie Antal